Best of 2009: Bottled Water for Pervs

Our favorite global water brand discovered in 2009! I dare you to refresh yourself with this bottle!

We’re taking it easy the last week of the year with reposts of some of our 2009 faves! In case you missed it: the bottle that proved “the best” is always a fleeting label.

—REPOSTED, Original Link Here
The amazing Yellow Surprise motivated me to begin this blog and I believed that it (along with ASS) would reign supreme in funny-water brand-land forever. Never say never. Yellow Surprise and ASS, meet the challenger, Golden Stream.

Eternal thanks to bikespod on Flickr for sharing this memory of his trip to Varkala, a coastal town on the Southern tip of India.

Best of 2009: Water and Drought Jokes: How Dry is It?

We’re taking it easy the last week of 2009 with reposts of some of our 2009 faves!

In case you missed it: In the thick of a blistering 2009 summer, we were inundated with news from far and wide of deep, devastating drought… so of course, that caused us to inquire, “Just HOW DRY is it?”

—REPOSTED, Original Link Here

Drought Turning Texas Dry as Toast: Yesterday I saw this headline on MSNBC (via WaterSISWeb) so that’s my cue to dig up my collection of “It’s so dry…” jokes.

So dry the birds are building their nests out of barbed wire.
So dry the Baptists are sprinkling and Methodists are spitting
It’s so dry that the Catholics are giving rain checks.
So dry the catfish are carrying canteens.
So dry the trees are bribing the dogs. (variation: It’s so dry that the trees are whistlin’ for the dogs.)
Its so dry here that the fire hydrants are chasing the dogs around.
So dry my duck don’t know how to swim.
It’s been dry so long we only got a quarter inch of rain during Noah’s Flood.
So dry I’m spitting cotton.
Dry as a powder house.
Dry as the heart of a haystack.
Dryer than a popcorn fart.
It’s so dry that the cows are giving evaporated milk. (variation: So dry the cows are giving powdered milk.)
It’s so dry the fish are knocking on the door, askin’ for a drink of water.
It’s so dry here the all the fish have ticks.
It’s so dry the Red Cross has launched a wet blanket appeal.
It’s so dry you’re only permitted to eat watermelon between 8pm and 8am.
It’s so dry the government has announced a water pistol buy back scheme.
It’s so dry, crooks are siphoning off radiators instead of gas tanks.
It’s so dry, they’re encouraging people to pee in the pool.
It’s so dry, all the Baptists are converting to Catholic.
It’s so dry, the the dogs are marking their territory with chalk lines.
It’s so dry they’ve had to close two lanes at the swimming pool.
It’s so dry the river only runs twice a week.

All new, original! A few more I thought of while writing this post:

So dry we’re fishin’ on lawn chairs with slingshots.
It’s so dry we went rafting on hand trucks.
So dry the water tower was held up at gunpoint.

Sources: collected from all over, including here, here, here, here, here and here!

Best of 2009: Clean Renewable Rubber Ducky Power

We’re taking it easy the last week of 2009 with reposts of some of our 2009 faves! In case you missed it: Our April 2009 post, Clean Renewable Rubber Ducky Power, in which an unusual public art installation inspires our visualization of a “million dollar idea” for tidal power generation!

—REPOSTED, Original Link Here

Some outside-the-tub thinking: I found this HUGE fella who’s cute, yellow, and chubby! The artist Florentijn Hofman, well known in his native Holland and throughout Europe, created an actual 100-foot long rubber ducky for ‘Loire Estuary 2007,’ an outdoor contemporary art exhibition in France.

OK, so here’s my million-dollar idea©: WHY can’t we put this guy in touch with a group working on tidal energy generation? How cool would it be to have have hundreds of these bobbing in the sea, generating clean renewable power while delighting the populace? How ’bout that, Earth Day celebrants?

Sustainable awesomeness. Just another reason why science and art should knock heads now and then!

But I digress. Here’s a charming description of the work from the artist’s website

A yellow spot on the horizon slowly approaches the coast. People have gatherd and watch in amazement as a giant yellow Rubber Duck approaches. The spectators are greeted by the duck, which slowly nods its head. The Rubber Duck knows no frontiers, it doesn’t discriminate people and doesn’t have a political connotation. The friendly, floating Rubber Duck has healing properties: it can relieve mondial tensions as well as define them. The rubber duck is soft, friendly and suitable for all ages!


Best of 2009: Water Quality Research For and By Dummies

We’re taking it easy the last week of 2009 with reposts of some of our 2009 faves! in case you missed it: Our March 2009 post, Water Quality Research For (and By) Dummies, In which we scooped the New York Times by months with our own exclusive research into tap water quality!

—REPOSTED, Original Link Here
Taste: recent research conducted both in the U.S. and Europe has repeatedly shown that taste (along with safety and convenience) is a leading motivator for the use of tap water alternatives. But tastes like what, exactly? To find out, we’ve done some exclusive research of our own.

Because Thirsty in Suburbia has zero qualifications or credentials to conduct sound, serious research, this “study” is absolutely non-scientific. Plus, since our stimulus check bounced we’re unfunded too!

Never mind, we will press on. Presenting the Google-based Virtual Water Taste Focus Group.

Methodology: In February, 2009 the exact phrase “our water tastes like” was entered into Google Search. 35 total results were returned and 6 were disqualified for syntax, leaving 29 “participants.” (♪ ♫ Don’t know much about science books ♫, but do know our way around Illustrator–so we’ve made a snazzy chart for you!)

1. our water tastes like chlorine
2. Our water tastes like pure and delicious water
3. our water tastes like dirt.
4. Our water tastes like water
5. Our water tastes like the premier bottled drinking water it is
6. our water tastes like shiat
7. our water tastes like dirt
8. our water tastes like tap water
9. our water tastes like dirt
10. Our water tastes like sulphur
11. our water tastes like lake water
12. our water tastes like crap
13. our water tastes like nectar from the tap
14. Our water tastes like the chlorine from a swimming pool.
15. our water tastes like bleach
16. our water tastes like algae
17. our water tastes like chlorine
18. our water tastes like horse s**t
19. our water tastes like it was strained through an ashtray
20. our water tastes like chemicals from new pipes
22. our water tastes like someone dissolved a nickel in it
23. Our water tastes like butt
24. Our water tastes like disinfectant
25. our water tastes like carrots
26. our water tastes like a swimming pool
27. our water tastes like something George Washington himself might take a sip of and die from
28. our water tastes like liquid gold
29. our water tastes like golden nectar

Sensational Singing Sewermen from Thames Water

The Singing Sewermen from Thames Water would like Brits to give the sewers a rest this Christmas, so the unconventional troupe has restyled the classic carol “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen” into “This Christmas Think of Sewermen.”

The song, part of Thames Water’s “Bin It Don’t Block It” campaign, was recorded deep in the Victorian sewers of East London on a hand-held camera. They’re singing with real feeling, and no wonder: an estimated 500 tonnes of fat (or 1.1 million pounds) – goes down customers’ drains each December, causing nasty blockages and backups…and some unpleasant work for the sewermen, no doubt.

Here’s the lyrics in case you’d like to sing along!

This Christmas think of sewermen who tremble in dismay
When grease from goose and fatted fowl is idly poured away
It clogs the drains of London and it must be scraped away.

Put your fat in the rubbish in a bin, throw it all in
Put your fat in the rubbish in a bin

So when you’ve had your Christmas meal of turkey, wine and pud
Remember our poor sewermen and treat them as you should.
Don’t pour your hot fat down the drain ’cause it will do no good.

Put your fat in the rubbish in a bin, throw it all in
Put your fat in the rubbish in a bin

Water Towers, Merry and Bright: Part 2

To make your season bright…part 2! Again in 2009 we’ve rounded up some fantastic festive towers decorated for the holiday season! (See Part 1 here or the 2008 collection here and here.)

The Southern Arkansas University Water Tower Candle, photographed by Sounds like “Jee” on Flickr. This circa-1976 water tower is the most recognizable landmark in Magnolia, Arkansas and features a peal of 14 cast bronze bells near the top. The illuminated holiday candle decoration is a tradition that was established in l988.

This photo is from the annual public tree lighting ceremony in Concord, North Carolina by Paul Purser on Flickr, shot while working on a book about Charlotte NC and surrounding communities. ( The water tower reads “All American City” and is a Concord icon. This great photo captures the city Christmas tree, the water tower, and fireworks in one shot.

A striking display from the City of Round Rock, Texas by Christopher Rose (khowaga1) on Flickr

This photo by mfng (Tom) on Flickr shows a landmark water tower in Durham, North Carolina. The site is a former Lucky Strike cigarette factory in the American Tobacco Historic District, now converted into a mixed-use campus of offices, restaurants and condos.

This water tower topped with a light tree is by gorfram on Flickr who notes that every year the Shoreline (Washington) Water District puts up a tree made of lights up on top of this water tower with local merchants donating towards the cost. Her photo was taken just as dusk was deepening into night. There’s a dusting of snow on top of the water tank, the Christmas tree is ringed by various radio masts and other equipment, and the twigs of a Japanese maple are in the foreground.

By QT Long at, a festive water tower in Tennessee.

Water Towers, Merry and Bright: Part 1

Water towers and Christmas lights are a natural combo so again in 2009 we’ve rounded up some fantastic festive towers decorated for the holiday season! (See the 2008 collection here and here.)

Beautiful dusk light accents this starry blue tower in Fresno, California by Matt (mistergoleta) on Flickr.

By Robb_Wilson on Flickr, we love this charming Charlie Brown-ish water tower spotted in Griffith Park, Los Angeles, California, where old railroad cars and engines are put out to pasture. This time of year, Robb says, “parts of the area are dressed up for Christmas.”

From the Mount Washington, Ohio 2009 Tower Lighting Ceremony by Rich Richmond on Flickr, who when contacted about including his photo in this feature said “I had no idea anywhere else was crazy enough to light up a water tower!”

TacSat Tim on Flickr took this photo of the Mannheim Water Tower during the annual Christmas market while stationed in Germany after returning home from Iraq in in 2006 (it was his first Christmas in Mannheim with his wife.) “Der Wasserturm” was built in 1889 and is a local landmark.

Not an real water tower, but charming nonetheless! =>tim<= on Flickr took this photo of a light display depicting a water tower with rail cars at the Midwest City, Oklahoma Holiday Lights Spectacular.

h2o mp3: Suzy Snowflake – Rosemary Clooney

A retro musical tribute to water’s most festive form! Rosemary Clooney’s 1951 version of Suzy Snowflake is an enduring and popular holiday tune. Break into your own acapella rendition of this song if you need to shake someone out of a crabby mood…works every time!


Here comes Suzy Snowflake
Dressed in a snow white gown
Tap, tap, tappin’ at your window pane
To tell you she’s in town

Here comes Suzy Snowflake
Soon you will hear her say
Come out everyone and play with me
I haven’t long to stay

If you want to make a snowman
I’ll help you make one – one, two, three
If you wanna take a sleigh ride (whee!)
The ride’s on me.

Here comes Suzy Snowflake
Look at her tumblin’ down
Bringing joy to every girl and boy
Suzy’s come to town

Play the track


Download Suzy Snowflake – Rosemary Clooney
Like it? Support the people who make music – buy this album or track at

Bonus animated Suzy! If you’re from the Chicago, Illinois area you might also be familiar with a 1953 cartoon-short based upon the song. Made with super-cool-at-the-time stop-motion animation, the film became a treasured annual Christmas tradition for countless children who grew up in the Chicagoland area.

What Modern Water Engineers Can Learn from Ancient Infrastructure

From TED: The ancient ingenuity of water harvesting: With wisdom and wit, Anupam Mishra talks about the amazing feats of engineering built centuries ago by the people of India’s Golden Desert to harvest water. These structures are still used today — and are often superior to modern water megaprojects. You’re likely familiar with TED (the organization has logged 50 million views since they began posting video two years ago) and TED Talks have become a powerful cultural force. TED presents short lectures from some of the best thinkers in the world from a broad range of disciplines with the mission of “spreading ideas” via “riveting talks by remarkable people, free to the world.” TED began in 1984 as a conference to bring together people from the increasingly melding worlds of Technology, Entertainment, and Design. Since then its scope has widened to embrace prominent thought leaders from around the globe. See Anupam Mishra’s bio here or access an interactive transcript of this video.