Posts

Can your iPad do all THIS? I don’t think so!

Note the importance of “this side facing up” lest you accidentally energize the table!

For all the innovative “pads” already devised, be they iPads, bachelor pads, mouse pads, maxipads, whatever…they all pale in comparison to this, the “Drinking Water Energizer Pad.” In the words of its enthusiastic marketer, Dr. K. Kannan (WOW, a Doctor!) on international marketplace www.alibaba.com

After years of Research we have created this sensational Energizer Pad, which we are sure will be the ultimate penacea for many human sufferings.

How, you ask, does this miraculous item work? It’s all based on sciencey-sounding principles:

Universal Energizer Pad is created, based on Indian Vedic Principles and is totally Non Invasive and harmless. It is charged with more than 1 million Angstrom units (Bovis Units) of Positive Energy permanently using the treasure of Vedic Principles.

You want a guarantee? Well, how’s THIS for a guarantee?

THE LIFE OF THIS ENERGIZER PAD IS LIFETIME.

WAIT, THERE’S MORE!!! I know you’re already excited, but consider it’s usable not only for water, but for just about anything that can be placed on top of it, rendering a plethora of items (even your mobile phone!) supercharged in a matter of minutes!

WHEN THE ITEM TO BE ENERGIZED IS KEPT OVER UNIVERSAL ENERGIZER PAD: IT

  • Positively Energizes drinking water many times, within 30 minutes.
  • Energized water whwn consumed helps to remove Toxins from body and helps to increase immunity.
  • Energized water when taken, activates all 7 Chakras of the body within minutes!
  • Energized water facilitates a sound sleep in the night.
  • Retains freshness of fruits, vegetables, milk, curd etc., and increases their energy levels.
  • Eliminates toxins considerably from Toxic eatables and drinks.
  • Positively charges any eatable items, including Medicines.
  • Highly energizes food we eat , with the plate on the Pad.
  • Harmonizes Mobile Phone Radiation for 24 hours when kept over night on the Pad.
  • Highly vitalizes Hair oils, Soaps, Shampoos, Body creams etc.,
  • Works as a good pain reliever when kept over or under the paining areas.

And best of all…this product will literally get you off your a** and moving. “Relieves stress considerably when used as a seat under the Chair cushion and helps to increase productivity considerably. Does enormous good to IT Professionals who are highly stressed lot.”

So don’t you feel silly now with your hopelessly old-fashioned Red Bull and ergonomic chair?

The Codepod Army, Defending your Water

You might be disgusted by this story. But I’m here to defend the recently-maligned codepods and rotifers. They don’t deserve this! They’re not disgusting, they’re misunderstood! You don’t believe me? Just bear with me for a minute.

A story that caused quite a stir this week; from the April 23, 2009 Hartford Courant (Connecticut):

MDC Finds Copepods And Rotifers In Water

After the discovery of microscopic organisms called copepods and rotifers in a Bloomfield home earlier this week, the MDC advised many of its customers to boil their water for one minute before consuming it.

Bloomfield resident Jim Pines found what looked like “tiny polliwogs” about half the size of the tip of a pen on Monday. Hundreds of them appeared to be swimming in a sample an MDC worker took from Pines’ filter Tuesday.

“The guy’s hair stood up on his arms and he said, ‘Stop drinking the water,'” Pines said. “It was completely disgusting. We were drinking them, washing out clothes in them, and it was just completely nasty.”.

Here’s why I ask that you don’t rush to judgement! These codepods come from a family of do-gooder tiny crustaceans that stand ready to GIVE THEIR LIVES for YOUR common good! Are you aware that they’re soliders in the war on terrorism? That they stand (well, swim, really) prepared to defend an attack on your water supply?!

I visited a municipal water quality lab a couple years ago, and one of the things I vividly remember is the surprising sight of tankfuls of CODEPODS. Well, they were water fleas, actually–daphnia to be specific. These little creatures are kept on hand for possible use as bioindicators–species used to monitor the health of an environment or ecosystem. (Somewhat like canaries, which were once carried into mines to detect poison gasses and warn miners to get out.)

In the wake of heightened security concerns after 9-11, an at-the-ready supply of these tiny animals is one of many security procedures that have been put into place. The lab has a ripe, ready-to-die batch available to go at all times in the event of an emergency, as well as other batches “on deck” in various stages of development. Funny, this lab was about as advanced and sophisticated as it gets, but these little guys are still one of the fastest ways to detect toxins and poisons in a water supply.

Not that I’m recommending that the folks in Connecticut drink the codepod-filled water, but the fact that they’re swimming around in there should be considered a positive sign!

Road Rules: Help with Highway Hydration

No wonder folks are confused! Following, some snapshots from my recent road trip from Kansas City to Chicago. Certainly, more information is better than less but I REALLY want to know…WHO, for example, would fill their water bottles from an oil and gas-splattered spigot at a fuel pump?

We spotted this at a gas station in Don’t-Know-Where, Missouri. In this town I concede that if you are parched, it is OK to bend the rules a little and head inside the C-Store for some bottled water.

Similarly, travelers are advised not to quench their thirst from a crumbling island in a remote Iowa rest stop. (I think the top sign must mean that RV’s should sink their lines and extract some fresh ground water instead. Oops, I meant groundwater.)

At another Iowa rest stop, though, this helpful signage points thirsty people to the bathrooms. (I might add that there were NO helpful signs on the toilets, like these, to dissuade people who might confuse the loos with the promised fountains.)

And at the Chicago IKEA (Bolingbrook, IL), helpful instructions in this bathroom floor display. This sent my imagination flying – there must be experiential reasons for this sign to exist, and I’ll bet some IKEA employees have some troubling stories to tell on why the sign is critical. (The stiffer acetate sheet used here has given me an idea on how to implement a 2010 technical improvement on the April Fools Day Toilet trick!)

Suburban Survival: Water Emergency Week Day 4

What could happen here in safe suburbia, really? Well… what if a flood, tornado, earthquake, blackout, ice storm or other emergency cut off your drinking water supply with no warning? And your huge legacy oak is blocking the escape route? Or if even the Suburban can’t navigate the quake-heaved streets?

After you’ve indulged in extreme self-hatred about your lack of preparedness, here’s where you can find drinking water around the home for a short term, quick supply.

1. The Toilet:Don’t make that face, this is an emergency! Not the bowl, dummy, that’s where you poop and where e-Coli lives. You can mine several gallons, though, from the tank. Filter it through a piece of cloth if it’s been awhile since that tank was cleaned. (You won’t be using your loo until service is restored; you can figure that one out for yourself.)

2. Hot Water Heater: A water bonanza of up to 70 gallons. To get at it, make sure gas and electric connections are off (and leave them off until service is restored). Put a large container under the water heater’s bottom drain and open the drain. Then, open a nearby sink faucet to release the pressure and start the flow.

3. Your Plumbing: The pipes are filled with residual water, and it’s just standin’ there doin’ nuthin’! Turn off the main water supply line to the house. Then open a water faucet at the highest point in your house to let air in. Next, open the faucet at your home’s lowest point–in the basement or downstairs–and let the water standing in the pipes drain via gravity into a container.

4. Ice cubes: As badly as you might want a cocktail, retrieve ice cubes from your freezer and put them into storage containers to melt.

Bad idea: Don’t pour yourself a chemical cocktail by drinking water from swimming pools or hot tubs.

Emergencies, Disasters and Scary Times

Under the dire headline, California faces ‘grimmest water situation ever’ The Guardian (UK) includes the quote from a local farmer, “It’s an absolute emergency and anything to get water flowing quickly is needed.”

Emergency. When that word is used in conjunction with water, you know things are getting scary. Before Hurricane Katrina, there were few Americans who could ever conceive of an wide-scale emergency in which they would lack access to adequate drinking water. Then we watched as Louisiana and Mississippi water utilities failed in the face of broken pipes and the lack of electricity to run pumping and treatment facilities. Water everywhere, and not a drop to drink, literally.

What does it take, water-wise, to survive in a disaster? According to www.disasterstuff.com, you’ll need at least 1 gallon of water per person per day for at least 2 weeks, preferably for a month.

The website points out this sobering example: if a moderate to major earthquake hit Los Angeles, California today, and only half of the population lost access to water for two weeks, the governement would need to bring in 25,863,740 gallons of water over the two week period just to provide subsistance water. Twenty-five million gallons of water just to survive. That is 1,847,410 gallons of water a day over roadways that will surely be damaged by the earthquake.

This site (and many others) sell just about everything you could imagine for surviving in a disaster. This includes drinking water in boxes and pouches as well as bags and jugs for transporting water. The 4.2 oz. pouches are $20.16 for a case of 100; 8.5 oz. boxed water is $2.09 for a 3-pack. All have a shelf life of approximately 5 years.

It’s the same idea, really, as bottled water but these sure don’t have the same chic-style branding of their bottled cousins!