We’re not into the rant-and-complain blog style around here, but this has got to be among the most annoying, grating campaigns and product positionings I’ve ever seen.

The ridiculously-named company Let Water Be Water, LLC is responsible for,

WAT-AAH!, the first sugar-free, functional water brand made specifically for kids by kids and their mothers.

Which is a contender for the single most preposterous statement in the history of PR flackery. (Thanks, fathers, for not participating in this.)

And if that’s not low enough, they shamelessly announce in this press release their “New WAT-AAH! Challenge…”

…to defy the expectation that kids will pick soda or juice over water. During the month of March, mothers who participate in the challenge will receive WAT-AAH! samples with instructions to put the bottled water in their fridge, alongside sodas and other sugary drinks. Mothers will be asked to write, photograph and videotape their kids’ responses and reactions to WAT-AAH!. “Challenge” participants and ongoing results are available at www.wat-aahchallenge.blogspot.com.
“We want to challenge the preconceived notions people have about kids and drinks,” says WAT-AAH!’s founder, Rose Cameron. “Our goal is to test the assumption that kids are addicted to sugar and think water is boring. We are confident that children will pick WAT-AAH! over the big guys with multi-million dollar beverage budgets and logos that believe they are ‘cool,’ and we invite moms everywhere to participate in this challenge.”

So, set up the fridge like this, parents! The little ones will pick the water every time, you’ll see! (The only thing this promotion proves is the lengths some people will go to get some free bottled water.)

Had enough? No? If you’re masochistic or in extreme-procrastination mode, you can visit their screechingly-bad website, filled with fingernails-on-the-blackboard declarations like “Be Supaah! Jump Highaah! Be Smart-aah!”

If all this fails, modern parents, try my method (with your kids’ permission, of course.) It’s been successfully road-tested on my three children and millions of others: “Soda? NO WAY-AHH. Here’s your tap WAT-AHH.”